January 27th 2014, at 9:49 PM, Mike and I were blessed with our first born child! Londyn Brooke Haney made her appearance 3 weeks early, weighing in at 7lbs 6oz, measuring 20 and 1/2 inches long. Now, according to my prenatal care, she was 3 weeks early. However I think they were off by 2 weeks the whole time, because I had calculated different dates, and I just couldn't imagine having a larger baby.
Since I had already told the story of Londyn's birth on "Two Pink Lines", I won't repeat the whole thing. I wanted to instead share some thoughts and feelings I've had since Londyn has been here. So here is a list of tips, thoughts, feelings, and emotions I think a lot of 1st time moms (or perhaps even a mom on her 3rd or 4th kid!) could relate to, in no particular order!
1. You will eventually get to sleep in longer intervals than 45 minutes.
2. Put lotion on them a thousand times a day if you want, they'll still peel like crazy for the first few weeks!
3. When you think you've packed enough diapers for an outing, pack 3 more.
4. To anyone who ever told you nursing is a blessing, and a beautiful thing, you will curse their name for that first week. After that, you'll join the choir and try assuring the next first-timer you know, that it is indeed a phenomenal thing, and tough it out, it's worth it!
5. The clothes that look so huge when they are first born, yeah, those sneak up on you in a couple weeks, and if you're not careful, you'll miss some outfits because by the time they LOOK like they'd fit, they're actually too small.
6. EVERYTHING is a phase. EVERYTHING. (I'm told this doesn't change as they get older either. Guess I'll have to find out on my own.) If they scream when you change their diaper, it will pass. Just when you think you've found the best way to soothe them, just wait, they'll change.
7. Staring at their sweet face doesn't get old. At least it hasn't for me at 8 weeks.
8. Panicing when you think about them being around other kids, its normal.
9. When experienced moms say "You're always more careful with your first kid", you'll laugh and say "Yeah you're probably right" but secretly inside you'll think, "Yeah right! I'll have to be this careful with ALL of mine, with the hood-rats I see running around today!"
10. That soft-spot on their head freaks you out to no end. It probably freaks dad out even worse when he discovers it 2 weeks after their born. You'll spend 10 minutes assuring him it is normal.
11. Remember how you got tired of hearing people say "Oh you just wait till you have your own!"? (or the times you'd complain about your dog and get the equivalently annoying "you aren't ready for a kid if you can't handle a dog".....I wanted to smack them too) Well, now you get to graduate to "Try having 2 or 3 kids!".
12. You're not a bad person for reconsidering the idea of having more kids after your first. For one, a newborn child is overwhelming, and the thought of having another one when THIS kid reaches their toddler years is scary as all get out! Oh, and you're not the only one who wonders how you could possibly love another child like your first. Trust me, coming from a middle child, it's possible, I'm the favorite. Right mom? (Something tells me my sister and brother feel the same way about themselves lol)
13. You will find yourself saying or thinking "Well I wish someone would have told me that sooner!" very often. The hospital staff do all but stick a bumper sticker on your car that says "Good luck!" on the way out! (And no, no one has made a book for first time moms and things they should know. Probably because they know you'd never have time or energy to read it.)
14. To add to number 13, I recommend making friends with experienced mommies as soon as you find out you're expecting. You'll want real life help, the online forums will only freak you out.
15. Not being able to sleep because you're pregnant and uncomfortable, and not being able to sleep because you have a newborn baby, they are two separate things. At least now when you wake up, its because the miracle of human life, not just because you can't hold your bladder for longer than an hour.
The last 5 things are for those who are married when you have your first child.
16. Remember you have a husband. He still needs love too. He still needs attention too. Remember you didn't marry him to have this child. Don't kick him to the curb emotionally.
17. You won't come to the realization of number 16 right away. If you have a good man, a Godly man, you'll be okay. He will be understanding and patient, and never make you feel an ounce of guilt for being completely submerged in new motherhood. (Thanks babe)
18. Your husband is trying. Do not have preconceived expectations for his role. Every team is different. He may not be a diaper changer. He can't really help with feeding if you nurse. He stresses out when the baby cries because he can't console them like you can. Give him credit, and THANK him for all he is doing to help. (Especially if he works to provide for your family)
19. Guys, I have some words for you too. As a new mom, she is a mess. Even though you're her help mate, she feels the weight of responsibility for the well-being of this kid on her shoulders. Be her support, be her saving grace, pray for her a hundred times a day, tell her she's doing an amazing job, especially after she calms a crying baby. You have been her rock since the day you fell in love, don't let that change now. In fact, magnify that, now more than ever.
20. She still likes to be close to you. She doesn't always feel beautiful or desirable because she can't always fix herself up. You have to make the effort a lot of the times. Don't dismiss this.
So thats really all I have today. I can't wait to actually share the fun journey of motherhood as a 1st timer with you! It is the most challenging, yet rewarding job I've ever had.
